wanting more

hanging out w/ mary on a southern california sunday. west hollywood, california.

i can’t believe that the year is drawing to a close so soon. this time last year, i was in guatemala traveling w/ lauren. i have grown a tremendous amount this year and it has been a journey w/ so many twists and turns, bumps and bruises. but everyone of those turns have made me a better person and photographer.

this blog has been an incredible asset for me. it has enabled me to document my experiences. just as in my photography, i don’t do it for anyone except myself. for me, the blog is a tool for growth. i am able to look back and see how far i have come and how much further i have to go.

am i reaching for success?  for money?  or is it satisfaction w/ my life? society presses me to understand ’success’ as something finite. do i consider myself successful? is it a place to be at? somewhere that i can come to and relax? in my understanding, i see ’success’ as a progression. success is the drive that pushes me to be a better person, a better photographer, a better friend, a better whatever. am i successful?! Definitely!! i strive everyday to be better! and i surround myself with those that pushes me to be better.  i find complacency lends itself to mediocrity.

” If you compromise what you’re trying to do just a little bit, you’ll end up compromising a little more the next day or the next week, and when you lift your head you’re suddenly really far away from where you’re trying to go.”

- Spike Jonze

stepping back

lauren putting on makeup. santa fe, new mexico.
© kevin t vu

having a photographic vision is definitely something that i am consistently thinking of. and as i reflect more on it, i realize that my photographic vision comes from who i am as a person, and not who i am as a photographer.

by taking a step back, i am better able to look at myself comprehensively. the decisions on who i surround myself with, what foods i enjoy eating, what clothes i wear, what type of art i’m interested in, etc. all have an impact on who i am. and i ask myself, why do i wear those clothes, why do i hang out w/ those people, why do i eat what i eat, why do i like that genre of art? my answers define the quality of life that i live and in turn define the quality of imagery that i put out.

the food that i enjoy eating elicit an emotion from me. when i plow into a good bowl of soulful chicken soup, i’m instantly taken home. the clothes that i wear are clean, simple and classic, i try not to follow the short-term cultural trends.  i love the visceral despair, ecstasy and drama of a caravaggio painting.  my close friends are amazingly loyal, trustworthy and deeply passionate about life.  (the words in bold are parameters for my vision and my brand)

you have to take the step back and see what you are saying with your life, only then can you really say anything with your photography.  this is where i want my vision to be.  my vision is a record of how i live my life.  i only hope that i can refine my vision enough to run parallel w/ how i live life and vice versa.

“I remember one of my friends saying to me ‘oh yeah, you just went to ny, you got lucky right?  you just got lucky?’  and he’s a photographer too and that comment gets me! There’s no such thing as luck for a start, you create your own. i just thought, well, you could look at it that way, but it wasn’t and you should try it and see…  You gotta be passionate about what you do, you really do.  Cause people notice it.. and they respect it. Its a very powerful drive to have.  It makes you sleep well at night if you do stuff you’re happy with that you’re making and achieving.”

- ben watts

persist

portrait session w/ ana-Lauren at her home. orange, california.
© kevin t vu

its great to have friends that are patient and willing to give you the time of day to photograph them. ana-lauren and i had a great time during our portrait session. of course, it helps to bring some good music and a chilled bottle of white wine. i shot these on a 35mm and 6×6 film camera. normally, i would look at the 6×6 frame and think that i ruined the image by not properly advancing the film. but i realize that the uniqueness of ‘flaws’ is the reason why film is still so amazing! you never know for sure until the roll is processed. you just have to go with it and make it work for your visual style.

i shot some portraits for a non-profit last week with my film and digital camera. i had a small softbox to a profoto 7a pack. it was a very simple setup. i used the the softbox as a side light and let the left side of the face drop to black. i had my 35mm film camera hardsynced to the pack and shot most of the portraits on film. i used the digital more as a polaroid to check out my lighting. it was the first time i used the 35mm konica w/ a strobe pack so i wanted to make sure i had some stuff on the digital as well, just in case nothing comes out on film. luckily i did that because when i got the roll of film back from the lab, there was nothing on the negative. i shot two rolls and it looked like the lab just processed 2 rolls of unshot film. so its always smart to cover your bases, otherwise you can easily lose some clients.

if you’ve read my previous post, you would know that i had an opportunity to move to chicago for work. i’ve decided to keep pursuing my work here. i feel that i’m starting to build the foundations here in LA and it would be a shame to leave it now. The biggest markets in the US are LA and NYC and i’ve made some inroads to both. For now, i’ll keep investing my time and work in LA.

I’ll leave you w/ some quotes I’ve been chewing on:

If I were to encapsulate what anyone must do, it would be to have a vision of life and depict that vision.
-Joel Peter Witkin

Never apologize for your own sense of beauty. Nobody can tell you what you should love. Do what you do brazenly and unapologetically. You cannot build your sense of aesthetics on a consensus.

Never compare your journey with someone else’s. It’s a marathon with no finish line. Someone else may start out faster than you, may seem to progress more quickly than you, but every runner has his/her own pace. Your journey is your journey, not a competition. You will never ‘arrive.’ No one ever does.

Embrace frustration. It pushes you to learn and grow, broadens your horizons and lights a fire under you when your work has gone cold. Nothing is more dangerous to an artist than complacency.

– Cheryl Jacobs Nicolai

forksheds

people relaxing by a tree. laguna beach, ca.
© kevin t vu

its been a consistent month of work for me and i’ve started to realize that i’ve made some in-roads in the photo community of LA. its been a bit arduous and slow, but i’m getting there.

as this is happening, i’ve also been in talks w/ a photographer in chicago who needs a full-time assistant. this is where the dilemma comes in. do i pick up and go or do i keep scratching and clawing here in LA. both offer great opportunities, but i need to see what’s best for my work and personality.

i cant complain as both are great options either way.

i’ve been reading rodney smith’s blog recently. if you dont know him, then go to his website now! his work is whimsical and has a timeless quality to it. the way he uses graphical/textual elements in his new book is wonderfully fluid!

there has been one entry that has really stuck w/ me.

“To say a photographer has a vision is to say the photographer has something unique to say about the world.  Why do some photographers have something unique to say, when so many others just shoot pictures that are general and lacking vision?  Most people would say it has to do with talent.  Maybe.  But maybe not.  Maybe it has nothing to do with talent.  Maybe it has to do with the ability to express one’s feelings.  The person who presents a strong vision has figured out a way to express his or her feelings, while others are struggling to do that.  Talent, then becomes not so much artistic talent, though that may be a good part of it, but rather emotional talent.”

What i have come to realize is that I could never be a documentary photographer.  I am run on my emotions.  People who meet me and who know my imagery find it perplexing.  They see a happy person and wonder why I have such dark imagery.  But that’s because they don’t know all the aspects of my personality.  The reason I shoot the way I do is because I’m traveling on this path that I have for myself, and it has, at times, been a very isolated road.  My work deals with personal issues in context to what is happening around me.  Its my view of how I see what is going on around me.  Seems a bit selfish, but I just can’t help it.  Its how I see the world.

vision and solitude

wild parrots, a gathering of artists and musicians performing their craft.
© kevin t vu

sorry for not updating in a while. i dont have much excuse because i do have the time. its more of a lack of inspiration due to how little i’ve been shooting recently.

i was able to photograph a wonderful event that gathered some amazing artists together. the above pictures are a sample from that night. there was such great creative energy in the forum and i was so glad to grab as much as i could.

work has been good, but inconsistent. it comes and it goes. you just have to ride with it. i am trying to figure out myself for the short term. would like to start another project so i’ve been playing w/ the idea of a roadtrip through baja. the whales come during the winter months so it would be fun to catch that while i work on my editorial portrait portfolio.

working w/ frank and art has been a tremendous learning experience. they are on different ends of the spectrum in their visual styles, but i love how they both use and search out natural light. we did an album shoot the other day at a beautiful beverly hills home and come 730pm, frank and an entourage of stylists, make-up artists, producers and assistants were busy running through the hills of LA searching for shafts of light before the sunset.  it was great to see that side of the shoot, especially since not a week ago we did a different shoot that used 32 profoto 7a packs.

well, i’ll leave you w/ some quotes i’ve read recently:

here’s the dilemma and the strength of photography.  its the easiest medium in which to be competent.  but, its the hardest medium in which to have personal vision that is readily identifiable.

– chuck close

we take pictures because of the kind of people we are.  we’re individuals.  and that’s why i take pictures the way i do.  i don’t say it’s the best way or the only way.  it’s just simply my way.

– arnold newman